Friday, January 22, 2016

Giving up

I wish I was reporting to you that I was sticking to my two week zero-carb regime strictly, but sadly I am not. Today I am quitting. It's only day five, but I just can't be this strict.

Two reasons: the main one is the runs.

I still have the runs, quite badly, and it's getting me down. I eat and it just runs through me.

Number Two: I have to cook for a family, and now I am cooking two or three separate meals, and that is something I have just managed to NOT do. Now I find I am doing it again, because my husband and son are not doing zero-carb. Also, I was invited out by by a mommy at my kids' school for a play-date at the Wimpy (it's a fast food burger joint) where they have a lovely play area. I could have ordered a soda water, I suppose, but...jeez, I ordered a coffee. I just don't feel like paying for a drink that is water. I'd rather pay for a coffee. So I had coffee.

So much for my resolve. The food part is fine. I can eat the meat, and all the fat and not stray, but having bowel trouble is a little uncomfortable and inconvenient. Imagine it happens whilst I am dropping or fetching my son? (Luckily it hasn't yet, but it could!)

Lastly, I am actually missing vegetables. Not so much for themselves, but for the fact that they provide flavour to meat (like tomatoe paste, garlic and onion in a stew) and for the fact that they absorb butter and can help you mop up some fat. The other day I ate fatty lamb ribs which I had baked in the oven and the fat had run out and pooled in the bottom of the pan. Now it was really difficult and a touch gross to just spoon up that liquid fat and eat it...but had I cooked up some onion in there, that would have really been nice!

So, no, I no longer want to feel deprived. I love zero-carb for many things - I feel generally better, in terms of muscle fatigue and cramps, than on just low-carb, so here is how I am going to do this going forward. I am going to take each day as it comes and do my best. If I feel like onions and garlic are going to improve the dish, I will use them. If I want to add butter as a sauce, I will fry up some mushrooms and use that (because melted butter just runs off the steak and onto the plate and doesn't stick to my meat all that easily). I am going to take my lessons from my few zero-carb days and apply them, but not be too rigid. And if I can do some days totally zero-carb, I will do them!

I have learnt that I can survive without coffee, but that I also really, really like it. So having gone a few days with just one cup of coffee, I will attempt to limit my coffee and rather eat food, but heck, a cup or two here and there are not gonna make such a big difference.

At the end of the day, any way of eating is all about sustainability, and realistically, as a wife and a mother, feeding a hungry kid and man, I can't be eating just meat and yet cooking other dishes for them. As a family, it's so much nicer, and I feel it's important, to sit down together and eat the same meal even if it's just once a day.

Zero-carb, you have taught me more about low-carb, and have shown me that I won't die without vegetables or fruit. You have been the one diet to get me to have NO chocolate in about two weeks. I have never gone without chocolate for that long - even on low-carb I ate 90%, one or two squares a day. You have taught me that I don't need variety, but I do like variety.

Perhaps I will make another attempt at clean zero-carb again but I am bowing out of the strictness today. My night time sinuses have not improved yet, and I know, I know it's way too soon to tell, but the fact is, I would rather just relax with my food and re-consider how I am going to move forward.

I kind of feel like I failed, but it's just my own little experiment and it definitely had it's value.

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